Treatment Today

After my last tough treatment I was vigilant today looking for any potential problems. I got up early, took a shower, had breakfast, did dishes, carried in 80 pounds of stove pellets and loaded them in the stove. Then I fed the dog, took the garbage out and laid out all of needles and drugs for treatment. Then I took round 1 of my pre drugs, did my lung testing, my oxygenation testing , my blood sugar testing and then my blood pressure testing and took round 2 of my pre treatment drugs. And then it was time to wait for the pokenator to come and stick the needles in.

Before I knew it I was laying on my bed and she was placing the needles that the gamma globulin would flow through for the next few hours. She checked the hole on my hip which is still healing from a site reaction I had in August and treated it and bandaged up up as well. Once everything was placed and the drugs were dripping in I gave her a big hug and headed to bed. In an hour I was coughing so I used my rescue inhaler. By the time I hit the mid way point I was wheezing like a pug dog. So I did two back to back duo neb treatments, loaded the second syringe in the pump and then headed back to bed. Where I dozed off and on for the next couple of hours.

I woke up wheezing as treatment was winding up, so I went and did another back to back duo neb treatment, which helped a lot. Caro was soon there to pull the needles and then say you are swollen and red. It is time to draw circles and see if it gets bigger or smaller. So for the next 15 minutes she drew pictures and watched what was going on. With a smile she said she would be back in a while to seem what they were doing ... Me I just crawled back in bed.

But the swelling was down when she came to check, which was very good news. So now it is almost 12 hours past treatment and I am ready for bed. Grateful that it went better than it did last time, but still a little concerned about the wheezing ...I would like to get that solved for sure before the next treatment.

Well ... That gives me two days ....

Connie

Sick, Sick

I had a Fire Department function today. Our local radio station KYLC brought in an incredible catered meal  to thank us for our work on the wild land fires this summer. Amazing barbecues! However, I was feeling pretty shaky when I got there. I tested my blood sugar, which was way high and then treated it, fully expecting to begin to feel better. But instead I was feeling worse and worse. So I gulped down my anti nausea meds and headed home where I proceeded to get sicker and sicker.

I could not stop throwing up. This seems to happen every few weeks on a Saturday and I have not figured it out. But I have decided to track it and see if I can find any patterns in this. I know that I would very much like to not repeat this misery any time soon.

I sooooo want to move to the other treatment ... It cannot be worse than this.

Just Connie

Surgeon's Visit

Yesterday I made the long trek to OHSU to meet with the surgeon about the mass on my pancreas. I was blessed to be driven by my good friends and we picked up my mother on the way. We got to pick up mom at my Aunt's house. It was so good to see her and it had been so long since I had been at her place. It did my heart good to be able to spend some time with her before we headed to the hospital.

We got there with time to spare so we atually we able to have some lunch together before we headed up to see the surgeon. I love spending time with go my mother and Carolyn so there was lots of laughter and fun.

I liked the surgeon a lot. And even better he did not feel that I needed to rush into surgery. I got s fur month reprieve. In four months I will go in for another endoscopy ultra sound to see if there has been any change in the mass. If there has not been then I will repeat in another four months.

So for now I can take a deep breath, work on getting my lung and immune system stronger. It is good to be able to put this aside for a few months and concentrate on the others for a while.

Now I just need insurance approval for the change in treatment and things will be great!

Just Connie

The Hunt for Gold

I did something today I have not done in a couple of years. I woke up to a glorious fall day, bright,sunny and cool. I knew I had to get my Sunday School lesson done and things prepared and laid out for Board meeting. So I headed to the church bright and early and got all my work done and then ... I headed up Gold Creek Road to meet up with my friend Dan.

I loaded Hope Puppy into the back of Dan's truck and we headed out mushroom hunting. It felt so good to be out in the woods again. I have really missed the hunt for gold, though my neighbor Phil has been good about keeping me supplied. But there is nothing like being out in the woods and letting the glory of God's creation fill your soul and wash all the yuck out.

So even though I only came back with 5 mushrooms, I came back filled with life. So very grateful for this beautiful place I live. So thankful for wonderful friends who help to get me outside and are willing to share their life and live with me,

I feel very blessed ..

Just Connie

Sick and Ick

I love it when the Fre Methodist Pastors get together. I love being with them, hearing about their ministries and being challenged by them. Today we got together to be stretched in some new ways. It was good, it would have been wonderful if I had been feeling better. However, I was struggling with treatment side effects from yesterday. Migraine, nausea, intestinal stuff ... And it just got worse as the day went on. By three I was a miserable lump in the lobby. Luckily my ride came and got me and took me home. Where I have spent the evening trying to just survive.

I will be so glad when treatment has changed and this will not be every single week. I am looking forward to getting some of my life back! Things like today's conference ... Imagine going somewhere and not getting sick!

I am pretty sure I could get used to that ....

Just Connie

steppin Out in Hope, Faith and Life

I got news from my  pulmunologist of Friday that was fairly overwhelming. One of the things I live about him is that he is very, very honest with me at all times. I gave needed that as I have maneuvered through the health care crisis. I am blessed by the doctors who are fighting for me to get better. I think my heart break came when I discovered I was actually much worse than I thought I was.

My pulmunologist called the surgeon who did the biopsy and spoke to him at great length, he called the pathologist and he called the surgeon all just outside of the room I was waiting in. So I got a lot of information I did not have, but I did need to know. They are not sure I am strong enough to tolerate surgery. That surprised me, but I got a better handle on why it needed to come out. It is a ticking time bomb and will not end well if it is left in.

The bottom line is that I am very ill and that is hard for me to wrap my arms around, my pulmunologist caught me crying and I have never done that before. He felt awful ... But yet I needed to know. And I know that crying Is part of processing it.

I need to embrace this new reality, learn from it, see what God says and keep fighting. My Adria's not given up, so why should I. I choose to live in Hope. I choose to live in the reality of Gods love and presence. I choose peace, life and the reality of living in Christ! I know there are good things ahead. God shows me over and over again.

Stepping out in faith, hope and life,

Just Connie

Family Thoughts

Family has always been very important to me. Living here in Willamina, I do not get to see my family very often. But today in spite of all the lung stuff going on, I packed up Hope Puppy, presents and decorations and headed to Burlington to celebrate the soon to be here 1st grand daughter of mine... Paisley.

My family out did themselves and showed up to celebrate, with food and gifts and love and laughter. I was so glad to be in the midst of my family, to see all my great nieces and nephews, to talk to little Paisley who is still hanging out in momma's tummy ... It was a joy and delight.

I am so hopeful that the new form of gamma globulin treatment will allow me to spend more time with my family and with my grand children. In fact I have to say that the chance to spend time with my family makes fighting to get better a very good idea.

Yep definitely worth it ....

Just Connie