Tuesday, October 30, 2012

The Truth

An integral part of ministry is counseling. I have always enjoyed it and felt it was something that comes naturally for me. However I am always aware that I do not have all the answers and the reality is that counseling is a whole lot of work. Not just for me but for the participants. It usually takes confronting some painful truths and making adjustments.

I have sat on both sides of the counseling desk. As the person walking through the changes and as the counselor guiding them through the changes. Both places have potential pitfalls.

After my husband left counseling was the pivotal point  in my healing. I know first hand the freedom that it can bring as you step into the light of the truth. I also know the pain and sorrow that comes along with it. I have come to realize that you have to feel the feelings to be able to move ahead. That takes courage and strength. For me, I know that I do not have the strength, the wisdom or the courage to do that. It only comes as I give my mind and heart to Christ. It also comes from the other people that join you in the journey. it comes from the counselors, friends and family who walk beside you and keep pointing you to the truth.

And I guess when you get right down to it that is what my job is ... just keep pointing to the truth. Because the truth will set us free.....

Just Connie

Monday, October 29, 2012

Kitchen Project

After two years of planning our church kitchen is finally underway. In just a few short weeks we will have a commercial kitchen space which will expand the possibilities for ministry. So many people have given to bring this project to fruition. I am so thankful for all the hard work, planning and dreaming that has gone into this project. It was a little over a month ago when a group of us met here are the church with sledge hammers and began dismantling the kitchen. For the last few weeks we have lived without a kitchen as we worked with plumbers, electricians and of course country officials to get everything in place.

Now things are finally moving ahead again. The electrician was here today and the plumber came this afternoon. They should finish up their work this week and then we can begin on the sheet rock and painting. Then the cabinets, the appliances and the floor will all be put into place.

This has been one of the most frustrating and the most rewarding projects I  think I have been involved with since I came to Willamina. Frustrating because of the red tape and the difficulties that are always part of it when change is imminent. But God has brought us through step by step ... sometimes kicking and screaming ... but has brought us to this place.

Yesterday afternoon a group of us came, shoveled cement and got the space all cleaned up and ready for today. The amazing thing is that I am not nearly as sore as I thought I would be today which is a blessing I am willing to accept.

I am excited to see what will happen in the next few weeks as we finish this beautiful kitchen and begin to expand our ministry into the community.

There are good things ahead ...

Just Connie

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Goober

I am now firmly convinced that I am a goober. Some days I seem to celebrate my "gooberness" more than others. Today was one of those days.

It had been a busy day. I had meetings, writing deadlines and a pile of desk work to wade through. I also had work crews busy in the church. The plumber was there getting ready to begin the plumbing part of the kitchen project and I had another crew putting up shelving in another area. Of course to build the shelves they had to drag everything out and what a collection of stuff they found. Stuff that should have been put away in their proper places, stray parts of plays, sets and costumes, musical equipment ... all kinds of things. So while it was all  out I began sorting through what could be thrown away and what needed to be stored somewhere else.

In the midst of that I had a family come in that needed a food box, so I ran over to the Church Food Bank and filled bags of food for them. Then I went back into the sanctuary and drug the 14 foot ladder in and put away all the things that needed to go up to attic storage. It was with a sense of satisfaction that I went back to my office and finished off some more desk work.

About 4:00 I began to pack everything up to go home and that is when things began to fall apart ... no keys. They were not in my briefcase and not on my desk, they were not in my coat pocket ... they were no where to be found. So I began to tear my office apart. I looked under things, I checked all the drawers in my desk and finally came to the realization that I had absolutely no idea where my keys were.

I wilted when I tried to think back over all the places I had been during the last couple of hours because I had been in every area of the church. But I began to backtrack and search. However .... there were no keys to be found. I finally called the Church Treasurer and asked if he would come and unlock the church office because I could not find my keys anywhere. When he finished laughing he said he would come and help in the search.

As I waited, I remembered that I had taken boxes up to the attic, so up the ladder I climbed and there on the very top .... sat my keys. As I stood there on the ladder I had a sudden memory of laying them on the top of the ladder to heave the box up to the attic. Now why in the world couldn't I have remembered that 30 minutes ago?

As I sat on the top of the ladder I called the Treasurer and told him the lost had been found. He of course found the whole thing highly entertaining ... me not nearly so much. In fact I felt really silly. How in the world could I have laid my keys down and left them there? How in the world could I have been so .... human?

And that was the point that I began to smile. It was pretty ridiculous ... how many people lose their keys on top of a 14 foot ladder? And the laughter began to bubble up as I thought about how very unlikely that was.

The reality is that mistakes are just that and there is a real danger to losing myself in false expectations of perfection. I am human, I will make mistakes and I need to let that be okay. I am what I am ... learning, growing and slowly being transformed into the person God created me to be.

And that is okay with me ....

Just Connie

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Project Thoughts

As a pastor I get involved in all kinds of projects. Small projects, big projects, church projects, community projects, school projects ... all kinds of projects. It is always a balancing project in itself to not have too many come due at the same time.

I have been working on a project the last couple of months that is beginning to DRIVE ME NUTS! Some might say that would be a short trip, but I find that I am spending more time feeling frustrated with this project that being blessed. Today I have been facing obstacle after obstacle and now ... people problems.

I think more than anything else people problems suck the life and joy out of me. I know that it is integral part of who I am and my call to pastoral ministry but sometimes .... I confess it tires me. I want people to play nice and get along, to have faith, to have love enough to overlook the slings and arrows of every day life. To extend grace ... imagine how that simple act could change things.

And of course the  hard part is that if I want other people to do that ... I need to do it myself. I need to play nice and get along with the incredibly diverse people that populates my life. I need to have faith in God, faith in other people and faith in myself. I need to love ... and love some more and when I get tired ... I need to love again. As I love, I need choose the gift of grace and let that be the bridge over the hurt, over the differences.

Lord let it be different and let it .... start with me ....

Just Me

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Acceptance & Love

Just got done meeting with my fellow pastors and I feel so blessed. Once a month  we gather together and lay down our denominational boundaries and share our hearts with each other. It is always an eclectic mix of laughter and serious discussion. It is one of the few places that you can totally be yourself without fear of rejection.

I think that giving each other the gift to be who we are is a precious gift. Most of us strive to fit into the box. The box we think we should be ... the box of who we think people will love, but it is so freeing when we can just be who we are ... and still be loved.

I hope that I can be that for others. That I can be loving, supportive and meet them right where they are. It is so easy to wrap my expectations and desires around the people I come into contact with ... I have to wonder what would change if I would just let them be who they are?

So I think today I am going to enjoy the gift I was given today and I am going to look for ways to share the acceptance and love I felt in that group with other people.

Imagine a world with more love .... i think I would like that.

Just Connie

Friday, October 5, 2012

Tonight

It has been a long day filled with a lot of stuff that I really did not want to do. But yet things that had to be done ... hard things ... that hurt my heart.

So here the day is nearly done and I am curled up on the couch thinking about this very long day. I have to admit that I am glad that it is behind me. This is not a day I would like to repeat.

But yet I am grateful for the grace and strength God gave me to get me though the challenges of the day. The day was hard, but God was big enough for everything I faced.

Big enough .... for today and big enough for tonight.

Just Connie

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Playing Catch Up

I have been playing catch up ... it is the sad reality of taking time off. My desk is still a mess, but I have some of the writing projects done that were due this week. I am having trouble coming to grips with the fact that Fall is not only here it is now in full swing!

With Fall comes a busier schedule and lots of activities. To fill up the empty spots (ha!) we have also completed demolition of the church kitchen and are now ready to actually begin to building process. So we have building going on.

The end of the month we have our annual Harvest Party Carnival for the community. It is a way for us to offer something fun and positive to  the community on Halloween. it is wonderful but it is a huge project and we have between 300-500 kids come through that night. So there is lots to do.

This afternoon  I will meet with the group at the West Valley Community Campus. We are still in the process of applying for our 501-C3. We are getting closer to it all the time. I am excited about working with this great group of people. They are dedicated and talented and this project has so much to offer the community.

Tonight I will meet with the Pastors Cabinet and we will look at where we are as a church and do our monthly check up on where we are.

So in just a little bit I will say goodbye to the mound of paperwork on my desk and head off to the next meeting. This is about the time of the week when I have to remind myself that taking time off really is a good idea.

At least I think it is ....

Just Connie