A Squirrel Story

Today is National Squirrel Day so in honor of this I am sharing my squirrel story.

It began with a case of pneumonia which kept me out of the office for 2 weeks. Finally the doctor cleared me to go in for a couple of hours to open my mail and check phone messages. feeling a bit weak and shaky I unlocked and opened the door. As the door swung open a squirrel launched himself off the desk right at my face. I would love to say that I stood there like a rock, but the reality is that I screamed like a little girl and slammed the door shut. I searched out the church janitor and together we herded the squirrel out the door.

As the squirrel scampered away the janitor turned to me and said, "What is the horrible smell?" Stepping into the door of my office I gazed with disbelief at my office while I help my hand over my nose trying to keep the stench at bay. Everywhere I looked there were shredded papers, books and over everything brown stuff. As I walked through the total destruction I began to make sense of what had happened. It seems that someone had put a box of chocolates on my desk as a special gift. Soon after the squirrel had chewed through the ceiling tiles and fallen into the office. It seems that the squirrel had spent the two weeks I was gone eating chocolates and drinking the water I had at my desk. The chocolate upset his little squirrel digestion and there was .... uhmmm squirrel stuff everywhere. Down the walls, the book cases, the couch, my desk and of course the carpet was indescribable.

The result of my squirrel visit was that my office got gutted. The carpet had to be replaced, the paint on the walls, I lost a good portion of my books in my library and all of the upholstered furniture. It took over two months until my office was usable again. All for one little squirrel.

The final insult was that the insurance company did not cover "vermin discharge". And that is a phrase I still do not want to think about.

Just Connie