Working On It

One of the things I have missed over the last couple of years while I have been ill is working alongside of the men at the church. I have missed the comraderie that comes when you are sharing the work of a project. I have missed spending time with my friends and missed being part of the service projects.

I have been feeling better over the past few weeks. My lungs are improving and I felt like I was gaining some strength. So when they asked me if I wanted to help them cut up a tree, I said "absolutely!"

I got all my errands and running around done early in the day, I laid out my work clothes and took a short nap and then .... Woke up sick, sick, sick! The side effects I had managed to keep at bay most of the week, hit hard. I managed to text them that I was struggling with side effects and would try to come if they let up at all. And then spent the next three hours miserable inside and out.

I was so disappointed, at what I was missing, at not being there to help ... At the rotten timing of the whole thing. And it highlighted how frustrating treatment is for me. Not only am I missing a couple of days out of my week, but the side effects can hit at any time.

I am working hard at accepting it because this is my reality and I want to find joy here. But I have to say I miss out on a lot that has been an important part of my life. I guess it is all about learning to embrace the changes.

I am working on it ...

Just Connie