I have just spent the last 24 hours with denominational leaders. They gathered all of the Conference Committees together to share vision and strategy for the future. The Bishop spoke with us three separate times. What he had to share with us was powerful. I am going to share with the church. It is the latest from the Bishops on the roles of the pastor and the role of the church board. It was very good.
It was also good to spend some time with other like minded leaders. I am glad for the chance but I have to admit that I am still struggling with feeling like the new kid on the block. In those moments between sessions I often found myself the odd man out. No one does it on purpose, they just naturally gravitate to the people they know. I tried hard to force myself to join the groups and to move around and interact. I did a fairly good job most of the time.
But I do tire of this feeling of not really fitting in. I know that it will eventually fade away as I get to know people and they get to know me. But I miss being a vital part of the larger group, being known and knowing everyone. I keep reminding myself that I felt the same way with the Nazarenes in the beginning. It took years to really fit in.
I wish that more of my life was comfortable right now. There is such discomfort at so many levels. But I guess that is to be expected during a time of transition. It is one of those things I will just have to “tough it” through. It will get better.
“You will increase my honor and comfort me once again.” Psalm 71:21
Thankfully I am not in this alone.
Just Connie
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