When I got to the intensive care unit at the hospital this morning I was overjoyed to see that my father was off the ventilator, talking and coherent. I was dismayed when I saw that one side of his face pulled down. As I watched him I realized that he was having trouble with the left side of his body. It was apparent that he had a small stroke or some kind of neurologic event during the surgery yesterday.
I wanted to lay my head down and cry, but I didn’t. I chatted, watched and waited. Over the next hours I was able to see visible improvement in Dad’s face. It was encouraging to see. But he has a long road to recovery stretching before him. Some of the issues facing him (besides recovery from his three major surgeries yesterday) are his blood pressure, his lungs and of course continuing to recover from his neurologic event.
It is still a scary thing to me to have my father in the hospital with such a life threatening issue. I am not sure that I have been the help that I have wanted to be for my extended family. It has been hard to put my emotions out of the way and try to deal with their hurts and fears. But I am committed to keep trying. Yesterday was not that successful, today went a little better. But I still have room for improvement.
It is good to know that tomorrow is a new day. I need a clean slate to make another run at it. It is good to know that our God gives second chances …. even third and fourth chances.
That is a good thing for me.
“But with you there is forgiveness” Psalm 130:4
Just Connie
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