Monday, August 10, 2009

Surgery Eve ... Again

Tomorrow is the big day. We report to the hospital at 5:00 in the morning. That means we have a 3:30 wake up call to get ready to go. I have a feeling that we will not get much sleep tonight.

This surgery is an amazing thing to me. Tomorrow the doctors will stop my father’s heart, circulate his blood through a machine and actually work on the heart itself. What incredible technology! I am very thankful for the skills and expertise that will restore my father’s health. But I admit to finding this a scary thing. It is too important … the results of failure too horrible to even think about.

I find myself once again in that strange position of being pastor to my family. I am very thankful for the opportunity to minister to them, to strengthen and encourage them. But yet … there are times that I do not want to be strong. I want to weep and tell them I am frightened, that I hate what is happening. I think I need to find that balance of being honest and transparent but yet show them the hope of Christ.

That hope is very real and it has never let me down. Sometimes hurt has obscured the hope momentarily, but the hope is still there. I am grateful for those who are faithfully praying for me, praying for my father and praying for the doctors who will be working on him in the days to come. Just the knowledge of their love and support strengthens me. I know that their prayers make a difference.

“God heard them, for their prayer reached heaven, his holy dwelling place.” 2 Chronicles 30:27

So, tonight we wait … tomorrow will come all too quickly.

Just Connie

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